About Me

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Kuching, Sarawak, Malaysia
I myself think that I'm nice. You don't and never assume you yourself as bad guy right? make sense... I'm friendly. <3 But I'm the shy type. I don't really open up to people I just met if we ever do meet~ Anyway, nice meeting you all!!


Counting days and down to earth

Hi readers.

Just as what the title says, i'm counting down and getting back to reality. The dreadful day is finally here. 2 and a half day to be exact.

Part of me is nervous, scared, and there is a little tiny weeny bit of me is excited. New challenges and new obstacles are bound to come. And as if i'm alright with it, the world don't. They hate me to disrupt my dream. *here we go again*... fine. I ain't want to touch that topic anyway.

And to mend my dream a bit, just a bit, i want to see if there is this singing club or maybe dancing club ( wtf! I cant even dance and sing well... but i do dance and sing in shower.. that count right??? )
Yeah that might mend my broken heart a bit before society ends me 2 years later.

Just as you know, i am very extremely sensitive and emotional. I ain't being called girly and cry baby for no reason. And i wonder why people even bother to care and tease when others are in a miserable stat. That is just so immoral. Like u drop ur ice cream and i step on it and eat mine in front of your face. You like that huh? I just somehow cannot understand how these people think. Making fun of others is ther specialty??? Well.. maybe..

Everything's gonna be alright. I know I know. I experienced before. Remember i went for a 6 months internship in Sinagapore alone too? Yup. I can manage. But only this time it includes a big sacrifice. My dream job. Just so to satisfy my family. Sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I feel so bad for myself as i cant even get myself what i want. Like fight for it. That is all bullshit. When your current condition don't allowed you to, no matter how hard you fought for it, you'llnever get what you want. Unless there is miracle.

And oh, someone told me "miracles do happen, jusy keep believing."
And then i was like "am i suppose to? I believe in them then and it breaks me."

Dream is always and forever beautiful. It forms and becomes whatever you want and how you want it. You are free. Free from restriction. Free from constriction. You don't need facade. You are just momentarily you. That is why it is beautiful.

Call me stupid for saying that means you are trap under the curse of the society, unable to dream happy dreams. It is partially true, hands up and agree with me. Society changes people.
Not to say everyone is evil and bad. But u get the hang of it. We watch out for every step we take. Never look back. They told me. Never.ever.look.back.

At first i never understand what does it really means. But as time goes by, i get a hang of it and i realise i should never have look back.
Depression and regrets is what attack you first. Even though u got succession in the past but those will get overshadowed by those mistakes and things you regret you have had done. It is a dark path behind you. That's why there is always this saying "there is no turning back" ....

Why am i even saying all these? Yeah yeah. I am not some counselor. Just i feel like sharing.since this is a blog and it was meant to share thoughts and feelings.

Got a surprise for ya!!!









Yup. Ooops. Friendzone. Yup. No turning back. Imma gonna be the best friend and wish and walk with this friend till the days we are going to break apart. I will always be there to support... i just hope our blossoming friendship last long. :) i'm not sad. Just surprise that i actually manage to crush on this friend. Too sudden and the urge is still strong. Hahahaha.. pathetic.. lets just stay friends and since there is no forever, then let us stay friends as long as we can manage. :)

Worst feeling ever huh!? But i am getting use to it. I've crushed few times before it is nothing new. So don't worry.. maybe it'll go way after a few years.. let us all hug and make peace.

Wish me luck...


1 comment:

  1. not talking this from my experience,since ive never been in love with anyone,but surely i can imagine that being in friendzone hurts a lot. T__T

    hope you will find some strength to keep living and striving :D